The paging story

This is a story I could not tell you in person, because the memory of it sends me into fits of laughter. I’m sure it will not come across as as funny as it was to me at the time, so I’ve put off including it.

It’s time.

One night my husband had gone to the supermarket for something or other. We mostly didn’t shop at the supermarket. We went to the groovy bulk organic hippie store on the corner. But now and then we needed something like Tylenol or Oreos, and it was off to King Soopers.

So my husband was gone to get a thing and Jer and I were at home talking about how it’s been 20 years since we had Tang.

Suddenly we had to have some Tang.

This was before cell phones, and we were thinking it was tragic we didn’t have this thought 10 minutes earlier.

Then we thought, hey, they have phones at King Soopers. Let’s call him there. They can page him.

This struck us as both brilliant and hilarious. We imagined his face when we told him we paged him because we wanted Tang.

While we waited for him to respond to the page, it occurred to us that it would be even funnier if we said we just called to say hi.

So we scrapped the Tang request and went with our new plan.

He didn’t even laugh a little.

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2 Responses to “The paging story”

  1. fred bauman Says:

    My paging story occurred in Las Vegas on my very first ever trip there.
    We (Viv, I and our best friends couple) drove in his brand new Thunderbird (But that’s another story) to the Tropicana where I had wangled comps (And that’s still another story) and after getting settled in went down to the casino to gamble.
    Best friend Ed came from a “connected” family in Connecticut where his dad had slots in the basement and rolling crap games wherever. Ed knew his way around dem bones. I on the other hand had never even held a pair of dice. Ed was also superstitious. He did not want me or anyone he knew at HIS crap table.
    Fair enough. The wives went to a nickle roulette table and I looked for a quarter crap table without success. Even then on the Strip the minimum was a dollar. OK, it’s only money. I settled at a table far away from Ed. There were may two, three other players, and I asked the croupier to give me just a brief how-to, which he did.
    It was a classic beginners luck. I made FIFTEEN straight passes. After about my sixth or seventh pass the crowd at my table was two-deep. Eventually I picked up my winnings and went to a house phone to page Ed. I wasn’t about to get near HIS table. It took a while but then he got on the phone. I told him, “fifteen straight passes.” He gasped audibly. How much did you win, he asked.
    Why, fifteen dollars, of course, I told him.
    I’m glad he was nowhere near me. He would probably have killed me. Not because I was an idiot gambler, but because I had pulled him from a hot table.

  2. gunky Says:

    that is really funny. not substitute-teacher-funny, but funny.

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