Call 911!

My daughter loved A.A. Milne poems. One evening while my son and husband were at Little League practice, she was reading When We Were Very Young — My Oldest Friend’s favorite book, which she gave as a welcome-baby gift.

The Baby was cheerfully reciting Rice Pudding.

She stopped abruptly. She was struck with an idea. “Can we make rice pudding?”

I called Mom, the knower of how to make everything. She came right over.

I opened the door to see red splatters across her T-shirt on her abdomen. She was urgent, ‘I’m bleeding! Call 911!’

I must introduce you to my mom here. My mother is not a practical jokester. She’s not even a laugher at practical jokesters. What she is is a worrier. For instance, she can’t watch when people on TV go up high. She begs me not to let my teenagers ride roller coasters. You get the picture.

I yelled, ‘Oh my God!’ and she smiled. Then she bent to pick up a dripping flat of strawberries.

Who was this woman?

I don’t know what made me remember this story, but it visited me early this morning.

Later I had to call Mom about something else. Before I hung up, I asked,  “Mom, do you remember that time you came over to make rice pudding–”

“No.”

“–and you had some strawberries–”

Laughter.

“You’re laughing?”

“That was a good one.” A good one? It was the only one.

She defended herself,  “I didn’t plan it. I noticed that juice looked just like blood. It was spontaneous.”

Spontaneity makes it OK to scare my intestines clean?

“You had such a look of horror on your face . . . ,” more laughing.

“Well, yeah. You scared me.”

‘”Yeah, that was a good one.”

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3 Responses to “Call 911!”

  1. roberto Says:

    Some people are warriors. Others are worriers.

    I understand why you told this story. This prank was highly out of character for her.

    It’s a little disturbing when somebody suddenly does something that is not them and has never been them over the course of decades.

  2. business review Says:

    …These days you can buy ready made rice pudding that the makers claim is as good as traditional home made rice pudding. Although this is not necessary the butter will make the rice pudding taste more creamy…Sprinkle the top of the pudding with nutmeg if desired.

  3. sirensong131 Says:

    “’That was a good one.’ A good one? It was the only one.”

    Ha ha! I love that!

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